Tuesday, 23 May 2017

5 Public Speaking Tips

What is the biggest limiting factor in your career progression?
For a huge number of people, the one thing that hinders them, is a fear of public speaking.

A recent client of mine was offered a promotion. Already the manager of a small team, the promotion involved managing an entire department. Although she was more than capable of doing the work, she turned the promotion down, because the new job required her to deliver presentations. Unfortunately this story is very common. Whether it's delivering big presentation, speaking to the MD or having regular team meetings, public speaking fear drastically holds back your career.

Here are five simple ways to be more confident.

1) Positive self-talk.

Notice the way you talk to yourself in your own mind. Do you say things to yourself such as,
"I'm terrible at presenting,"
"I always go bright red,"
"I'm boring,"
"People will think I'm stupid."

Even the most confident speakers would feel anxious if their inner monologue was this negative before a talk. Imagine someone you care about. Perhaps a best friend or sibling. Would you ever tell them they looked stupid? Or that they were terrible at presenting? No, of course you wouldn't. So don't say it to yourself. Talk to yourself in your own mind in an encouraging way, as if you are motivating a best friend.

2) Challenge yourself

We all have a comfort circle around us. The problem is, when we fear certain situations, we tend to avoid them. The result is our circle of comfort gets smaller. To become more confident you need to challenge yourself instead of avoiding situations. Challenge yourself to speak to a senior colleague, speak up in a team meeting or ask a question during a presentation.

3) Toastmasters

Toastmasters are a wonderful organization, with meetings all over the world, whose aim is to teach people how to present well. It doesn't matter if you can speak comfortably to a room full of people for ten minutes or are too nervous to introduce yourself, Toastmasters can accommodate you. It is a great way to build confidence and skill at public speaking.

4) Imagine through to the end.

When we think about something we fear, we tend to imagine the worst part. When you imagine future presentations or ones you have done in the past, you probably imagine the part when you first stand up and everyone looks at you. Our minds then get stuck in the most fear inducing part of the experience. Change the way you think. Imagine presentations through to the end. Whether it is remembering past presentations or thinking about future ones, imagine through to the end when you thank your audience, receive a round of applause and return to your seat. This teaches your mind that you are ok in that situation and it does end.

5) Fear Of Public Speaking Hypnosis MP3

Download a great hypnosis MP3, to easily overcome this fear here.

Thursday, 2 March 2017

10 Ways To Feel Happy

Want an easy way to lift your mood and feel great? Here are 10 simple things you can do today to feel instantly better.

1) Take some gentle exercise, preferably outside. Exercise gets our blood flowing, which gets rid of that lethargic feeling we sometimes have when we're feeling down. We also feel a sense of accomplishment when we exercise and of course, there are the obvious health benefits. You don't have to run a marathon to get these benefits, a walk outside will provide many of the same mood lifting properties. If you can get some exercise outside, this is even better as sunlight is good for our mood.

2) Do something for yourself every day. Often, if we are feeling low, and particularly if we have low self-esteem, we have a tendency to put everyone else's needs before our own. So, perhaps you make sure your boss, children, friends, parents etc. are all happy each day, leaving no energy for yourself. Each time we do this we are subconsciously telling ourselves,
"I'm not important. My needs are not as important as other people's."
Each time we send this subconscious message to ourselves, our self-esteem takes another knock. To feel good, take some time everyday to do something that is just for you. This isn't something you should do or need to do. It's not a chore or obligation. It's something you want to do. For me, it is taking time to have a nice coffee and read a travel magazine, in a beautiful location. Even if it is just for ten minutes per day, for those ten minutes you are subconsciously telling yourself,
"I'm important. My needs are important and I deserve to be happy."

3) Accept compliments with a thank you. When we are feeling low we have a tendency to deflect compliments. For example,
"You look lovely in that dress."
"Oh this old thing. Nah, I've had it for ages and it makes my arse look huge."
Sound familiar?
Accept compliments with a thank you is a great way to boost self-confidence. It's also more polite to the person giving you the compliment.

4) Write down three good things about yourself each day. This is another great way to boost self-confidence, which in turn helps you to feel better in every area of your life. These could be things you like about your physical appearance, talents you have, things you've done well that day, being a good friend etc. It's important to write these down, not just think them, as seeing them in written form imprints them into your mind more effectively.

5) Write down three good things about the day. When we are feeling a bit sad or depressed, our perception of the world changes. We notice the things that go wrong each day. We dwell on the negative and filter out the positive. This distorted view of the world makes our mood even worse and exacerbates the problem. A good way to break this negative cycle is to write down at least three good things about each day. If you struggle with this, start small. For example:
  • The Spring flowers are out in the garden.
  • I'm lucky enough to have enough money to feed my family every day
  • I heard a song I really like on the radio.
6) Watch some comedy. They say laughter is the best medicine and there is certainly some truth in this statement. When you're feeling a bit low, watch some stand up comedy on TV or a comedy film. It's a great way to lift your mood.

7) Spend time with people who make you feel good. We are social animals and we need human interaction. Choose the people you associate with wisely. We all have those people in our lives who make us feel a bit crap. It could be that they are criticize us, are confrontational or are very negative.When you need to lift your mood, make a conscious effort to spend time with people who are upbeat, kind and make you feel good.

8) Set yourself up to win. In modern life we put a lot of pressure on ourselves. We want to have a thriving career, be the perfect parent, have a busy social life and look fantastic. Often when we achieve a goal, such as a promotion, we immediately start focussing on the next target. This creates a feeling that we are constantly failing. Create ways you can win each day. When you are setting goals for the day, have some small, achievable ones on there. If you have a To Do list make sure this includes some smaller items. These small wins create a feeling of success, which keeps you motivated and happy.

9) Focus on the here and now. We can focus on the past, the present or the future. Of course, we need to allocate some time to each, to function normally. However, when people dwell excessively on the past, it can lead to depression. On the other hand, when people focus excessively on the future, it can lead to feelings of anxiety. Focus on the here and now, what is going on today, what you can see, hear and experience around you right now, what makes you happy today. This is a great way to boost your happiness.

10) Download my Boost Confidence Hypnosis MP3 below.