Thursday, 18 December 2014

How to increase self-confidence


People often associate hypnotherapy with weight loss and giving up smoking. However, in my years of practice, I have seen far more people for confidence and self-esteem issues.
Low self-confidence and self-esteem is a very common problem. For some people it’s a general feeling of not being good enough, or a fear of being found out. For others, they feel a lack of confidence in certain situations, such as social events, or in meetings at work.
Although a lack of self-confidence is very common, it can also be crippling. Before coming to see me, many of my clients had been held back from achieving their full potential. People who lack confidence in social situations often get very anxious about them and therefore avoid socialising. This can make them feel lonely. Others, who lack confidence in a work environment, have often not progressed as far as they could have in their careers, because they avoided interviews or speaking up in meetings.
However, there is no need to feel like this. You can easy build your self confidence. Here are eight simple steps to take to increase your self-confidence:
11)      Download your hypnosis MP3 to Build Self-Confidence.
A freebie just for you guys. You can have a hypnosis MP3 (usually £10) for building self-confidence. Simply email me on cs@cs-hypnotherapy.co.uk with the message "I want to be super confident." 
22)      Accept compliments  
What happens when you receive a compliment? Do you immediately deflect  or dismiss it? It’s very common to push compliments away when you have low self-confidence. From now on accept compliments with a simple “Thank You.” Also, make sure you accept the compliment in your own mind.

3)      Do something every day just for you.
 Plan something every day that you enjoy. This is not something you should do, or need to do. It’s something that you want to do. This lifts your mood and is great for your self-esteem as you are putting yourself first.




4)      Speak to yourself as though you are your own best friend  
Notice how you speak to yourself in your own mind. We often speak to ourselves in a very negative way. Are you ever critical about yourself in your own mind? Often we say things to ourselves that we wouldn’t dream of saying to a best friend. Speaking to yourself in a negative way has a detrimental effect on your confidence. From now on, talk to yourself in an encouraging and motivational way. It’s amazing how quickly this will make a difference to your self-confidence.

55)      Learn from others.
As children, we learn by copying the behaviour of adults. This learning continues when we are adults. We can learn negative or positive behaviours from others. Think of someone who is confident. Choose someone who is quietly confident, and has an air of calm and being happy in their own skin. Don’t choose someone who is overly loud or brash. These people often lack confidence too. Once you’ve thought of someone who has an air of inner confidence, notice how they behave. How do they speak? How do they walk? How do they use eye contact? Once you’ve noticed these things, start incorporating them into your own behaviour patterns. At first this feels a little artificial, but it soon becomes second nature.

66)      Challenge yourself.
If we are anxious about certain situations, if certain situations are beyond your comfort zone, it’s very easy to avoid those situations. The problem is, that by avoiding certain situations, your comfort zone becomes smaller and smaller. As you avoid things, you become more anxious about less challenging situations, and avoid them to. Until, you become very limited in what you can do. Challenging yourself reverses this process. Push your boundaries. Do something every day that scares you a little. This is a great thing to do. It puts you back in control. You also show yourself that you can handle various situations.

77)      Write down three good things about yourself
When we have low self-confidence and self-esteem, we often fail to see the good things about ourselves. We can be very hard on ourselves. Every day write down three good things about yourself. These could be things you like about your physical appearance, talents you have, or things you have done well that day. At first this can be difficult, particularly if you have low self-esteem. However, over time it becomes easier.

88)      Surround yourself with positive people
 We are influenced by those around us. If you spend a lot of time with people who are anxious are depressed, it will naturally affect you. Spend more time with happy confident people and it will bring you up.


Tuesday, 9 December 2014

How to have a stress free Christmas


Christmas should be a fun time of year. However, with the pressures of present buying, entertaining family and industrial scale food production, Christmas can turn into a stressful time of year. Not to mention the dreaded work Christmas party, loved by the supermodels of this world, loathed by the vast majority. So, how do you relax and enjoy the Christmas season?

Here are five simple ways to have a stress free Christmas.

1)      Notice the good things about yourself. Christmas parties can bring out many people’s insecurities. Instead of focusing on the negative, find five things about yourself that you like. Imagine what your best friend would say to compliment you, and say the same thing to yourself. It’s amazing how this shift in perspective boosts your confidence.
2)      Don’t catastophize. Sometimes, when we’re feeling stressed, small problems seem bigger. We sometimes imagine the worst case scenario. When you notice yourself catastophizing, stop! Challenge your thoughts. Will you be hated by the whole of humanity if you over cook the sprouts? –Unlikely. If you can’t buy the exact present you wanted for your partner. What’s the worst that can really happen? Make you sure you keep small issues in perspective.
3)      Say No. We often want to please everyone. However, it’s OK to be a little selfish from time to time. If you feel too busy to attend an event, say No to it. If you have got too much on your plate, (metaphorically speaking!), then ask family members or friends to help. It’s important to look after yourself and not to get swept up in putting everyone else’s needs before your own.
4)      Do something every day just for you. Plan something each day, which you enjoy. This is not
something you have to do or should do, it’s something you want to do. It could be something like reading a book or magazine, meeting up with a friend, or going for a walk. Do something every day just for you. This is a great way to relax, feel happier and also to boost your self-esteem.

5)      Download my free Wash Away Stress MP3 (usually £10) here.